Outreach to Donna

Northeast America was recently pummeled by Hurricane Sandy.  New York and New Jersey continue to suffer greatly.  According to Reuters:

"At least 121 people have perished in the storm, which caused an estimated $50 billion in property damage and economic losses and ranks as on of the most destructive natural disasters to hit the U.S. Northeast."

People from as far as California have left their hometowns to help those devastated by the storm.  When I hear about these acts of love & compassion, I am reminded about what ties many of us Americans together - our citizenship as Americans.    I am also reminded of how little my personal challenges in life are compared to the thousands in the Northeast.  With all of the havoc Sandy has caused, it's hard to think about others in need elsewhere.

Well, just this evening I received a message from a fellow writer/blogger, Christian Aligo, back home in the Philippines about a young lady in need.  I didn't take it seriously at first.  In fact, my knee-jerk reaction was to dismiss it because it seems like everyone is in need these days.  Then I read the post he wrote and suddenly I felt like a Californian wanting to help a New Yorker thousands of miles away.

I say this because she happens to be Igorot, and her family is from Guinzadan, Bauko, Mountain Province in the Philippines; the same place my parents and relatives are from.  I don't know her or her family, but there's that sense of citizenship that compels me to write this hoping that it will reach others who are in a position to help this young lady.

Source: Christian Lizardo Aligo Blog

The name of the young lady is Donna Canuto Cuaresma, but rather than tell you about her myself, I will share what my friend Christian Aligo wrote about her in his blog post.  It reads:

"Donna Canuto Cuaresma, 20, was once a dance trainer of the youth in Isabela, Philippines. She was also president of a religious youth organization in her community.

"Donna was an active athlete in the field of dancing while high school," added Rufina Canuto Kilip, Donna's aunt, on crowd-sourcing site Indegogo. 

However her liveliness turned gray when she was diagnosed with Stage 5 Chronic Kidney disease secondary to Lupus Nephritis, an autoimmune disease that attacks normal body tissues.  The illness has already affected her heart, lungs, and kidneys.

Donna's kidneys have deteriorated and a transplant is needed to save her life.

She is having a regular dialysis at St. John Biocare and at the Dialysis Center in Quezon City.  She also does workups for the needed transplant at the National Kidney and Transplant Institute.

According to her aunt, Donna is undergoing dialysis three times a week and each session costs P3, 400 [$82.67].  Moreover, she needs P20,500/month [$498.48] for her medicines.  For her kidney transplant, she needs at least P150,000 [$3647.41]. 

Donna's mother Maximina Babtoog Canuto-Cuaresma is originally from Bagnen and Guinsadan, Bauko, Mountain Province.  She teaches at Quezon Public High School.

"We have spent all our savings and not to mention of the number of debts we have, shared Rugina who manages the online fund-raising event.  We also solicited financial help from friends and relatives."

In an update posted November 12, rufina narrated that "Her sister is the one with her now in the hospital to look after her while it's her school semestrar break for her mom is going back to work starting today.  When Donna's sister goes back to school next week, their dad will take over to look after her."

I come to knock at the door of people with open heart to give," appeals Rufina. 

For more information, including where to send financial support, please go directly to Christian Lizardo Aligo's original blog post at:  http://goo.gl/Qy2J9

Tim Tebow: Understanding the Spin and Seeing the Bigger Picture

This is a re-published article originally published on Yahoo

On the morning of February 03, 2012, ESPN aired an interview that featured Tim Tebow. In it, ESPN's Skip Bayless did not focus on Tebow's highly criticized throwing motion or his ability as an NFL quarterback. Given the limited amount of air time the interview was allotted, he knew he needed to cut through these superficial topics and get right down to what has made Tebow the most polarizing athlete of 2011. Next to politics, there's nothing more that polarizes Americans than the topic of religion. Recognizing this fact, ESPN chose a snippet of the interview in its thirty one second teaser commercial that featured Skip Bayless asking Tebow, "How much of a role does God play in winning or losing a football game?"

In the interview, Tebow responded by saying, "That's a good question. I think for me . . . when I'm praying before games and during games, when I get on my knees in what's become Tebowing . . . I'm asking the Lord for strength whether I win or I lose, whether I'm the hero or the goat; I'm still gonna be the same person. I'm gonna treat others the way I want to be treated. I'm gonna do my best and I'm gonna do what's right and regardless, I'm gonna give Him the glory, and part of taking a knee is humbling yourself and it's a form of showing humility where you're putting someone else first and putting the Lord first, and that's why I do it. . . More than anything, more than asking for wins and losses - I'm asking that I have a platform to honor Him."

Bayless went on to say, "So bottom line, you don't think that God decides football games," and Tebow responded, "You know, I think God is involved in every aspect of our life." Bayless continued, "Or is it beyond you to know?"

"It's absolutely beyond me to know," replied Tebow. "I think God's in every aspect of our life, regardless, and I think the greatest thing is if we are honoring Him with what we do."

This was the best piece of media I've seen about Tim Tebow all year. Skip Bayless did a remarkable job, especially with the way he conducted the interview with a sense of fairness that hasn't been given to Tebow since entering the NFL. Rather than talk about all of his great attributes, mainstream society has preferred to surround him with controversy, which has been spearheaded by the media. Nobody understands controversy better than the media. Instead of taking an objective look at Tebow's admirable character traits and promote him as a great role model for people, the media chose to bask in the controversy surrounding "Tebowmania" and "Tebowing."

Wherever there is controversy, be sure that a trail of money follows it. For the media and profiteers to create a win-win scenario for themselves, they knew that it is as simple as igniting controversy by creating a love-him or hate-him attitude toward Tebow and fueling it with anything they can dig up on him. Knowing that there needs to always be a catalyst provoking both extreme feelings, the media remains relentless on spinning the public's mind. The more people they can spin to either extreme, the more money there is to be made.

Whether people realize it or not, they fuel the media's spin cycle by choosing either sides of the Tebow spectrum. Even I realize that by writing this article; I too am feeding the flames of controversy. In order for people to keep from fueling the media's spin, they would have to totally cut themselves off from the media or find the middle ground. Neither is something the media would like to see happen, especially the latter. When someone chooses the middle ground, they realize that there is neither hate nor love, but rather a sincere appreciation for the man and his character. This can be damaging for the media because they and their ulterior motives are exposed, and when this happens, their flaming profits begin to smolder; all the more reason why they continuously need to find good and bad things to spin.

Take for example, Tebowing, which is one of the biggest things fueling their spin. Just so you know, Tim Tebow isn't the first football player to kneel and pray in public or on a football field. During his February 01, 2012 appearance on the Jimmy Fallon show, he made this same statement to everyone watching. Interestingly enough, NFL.com also released recent a video called "The Book of Tebow," which clearly points this out.

Personally speaking, I have seen players do this long before Tebow. My first recollection of this happening was sometime during the 1978 NFL season when I saw Roger Staubach kneel and pray on the sideline during one of their games. As an elementary school kid, I was captivated by the sight of number 12 praying. There was something about seeing one of the best quarterbacks of that time praying on the field that shed a positive light on the act of praying. I remember how my love for the Cowboys immediately shifted to my admiration for Roger Staubach because of it.

From that point on, I made it a point to always look for magazines that featured Staubach whenever I was at a grocery store with my parents or at the public library. One day, I scrounged up a dollar and some change to buy my first and most memorable magazine - the September 04, 1978 edition of Sports Illustrated that featured Staubach on its cover with the words "Roger Staubach, Straight Arrow of the Cowboys."

It was the first thing I had ever read that made an inspirational impact on my life. I read it over and over again. I admired the kind of man he was because of how he always went to church, performed good deeds for others, served in the Navy during the Vietnam War, was a Heisman Trophy winner and one of the better quarterbacks at the time who kept winning games, often times coming from behind in the last quarter. Sound familiar? As a kid, I wanted to be like Staubach. When my friends and I played street football, I always pretended to be Staubach. Although football never became a vocational occupation for me, the image of Staubach and what he meant to me as a kid still resonates with me today.

When Tim Tebow was captured on film doing what Roger Staubach and many others before and after him did on their knee, such as Reggie White, Kurt Warner and Drew Brees (to name a few), Tebow was unfairly deemed as the creator of the popularized "Tebowing" act. I use the word unfairly because Tebowing, as most people understand it, is probably far from what Tebow would like it to be portrayed as. On the recent Jimmy Fallon show, he admitted that he is flattered by the sight of people imitating him on his knee, but I seriously doubt that it was his intent to make it into the novelty it is today. Kudos to those who actually pray when Tebowing in a picture, but I seriously doubt most people whose Tebowing pictures appear in the media and internet are actually praying. Also, I highly doubt that the people who coined the term and image of "Tebowing" were trying to encourage and promote prayer. There's a big difference between the conversations Tebow has with God on his knee and the superficial act of imitating him for any other reason than to pray.

The controversy surrounding Tebowing is unparalleled in the sporting world because it not only provokes controversy from non-believers, but it also rubs many Christians the wrong way. It's not unusual to see comments from Christians who attack and chastise Tebow with scriptures like Mathew 6:5-6, which speaks against public prayer. Such attacks are an added bonus for the media. After all, what could be better than having Christians and non-believers going at it? That's right, Christians fighting amongst themselves. Again, people tend to miss the bigger picture when they're caught up in the spin.

After the interview first aired on ESPN's First Take show, Skip Bayless, Stephen A. Smith and Jay Crawford had a discussion in where Smith, a huge critic of Tebow, came close to seeing the bigger picture, but managed to miss it in the end. After sincerely stating his appreciation for Tebow, Smith went on to say, "They're using him. When you talk about Tebowmania and the critics per say, what they're talking about is - you want us to be just like him. And a lot of people ain't. They could feel their love for God is sincere and it's deep, but they ain't him . . . When you look at a guy like Tim Tebow, you understand that he is legitimate with how he approaches it, but you fear that the public at large that supports him, support him not just because they like him, but because they want to use him as an example of what they want the rest of us to be. . . and so when Tim Tebow is out there and he's Tebowing and things of that nature, I'm not faulting him for it, but I don't want him to think that he has critics because of him. He has critics because of what his supporters want everyone else to be, and that's where the resistance comes because a lot of people on their best day cannot be that young man. They can't be him."

Then almost instantly, Skip Bayless brought Smith closer to the bigger picture by quickly responding, "But he is a pretty good role model." At which Smith replied, "Yeah great - fantastic - no doubt."

Only when one removes himself or herself from the spin of it all can one come to a middle ground, which is an understanding about Tebow that earns a true sense of appreciation, no matter how one feels about him as a football player. In order to come to this level of appreciation, all one has to do is learn more about him as a person, and people can do this by simply reading his book, "Through my Eyes." Those who have read it will see why people like Chuck Norris, Tony Dungy, Urban Meyer and Darius Rucker have rave reviews for it, but most importantly, they will come to know that there is much more about him than what the media portrays.

Times have drastically changed since Roger Staubach's days. Back then, families weren't as fragmented, role models were much more sought after, social Marxism and political correctness were at its infancy stages and a person's faith wasn't attacked in such a frequent and hostile manner as these days. If Tim Tebow were to have played in the NFL back then, he wouldn't have had the level of controversy surrounding him because of Staubach. The similarities that they share would not have diluted Tebow's uniqueness.

Both are known for their fourth quarter comebacks (Staubach was nicknamed "Captain Comeback" and the Broncos' fourth quarter is known as "Tebow time"); both ran headfirst into their opponents, both of their lives don't end at the goal line, both have a global perspective on life thanks to their experiences oversees (Vietnam for Staubach and Philippines for Tebow), both are incredible humanitarians and most importantly - they both are strong in their Christian faith and they aren't afraid to share it with others. These similarities would have likely resulted in the absence of Tebowing and what is now known as the Tebow phenomenon. Also, Tebow would have probably been surrounded with miniscule controversy compared to that which surrounds him today. At the most, he would have been placed alongside Staubach as another NFL quarterback that contrasted the womanizing and overly egotistical likes of Joe Namath.

Unfortunately for Tebow, he isn't afforded such luxury of playing football in the 1970's. Instead, he has to live in an era where Christian values are constantly threatened, and greed, vanity and selfishness are at an all time high.

If more people would step outside of the spin and remove their love-him or hate-him lens; they will realize how wrong the media is for trying to get people to think that they have to be just like Tebow to be a good person and how wrong they are for attacking him because he tries to honor God in whatever he does. They will also see that the scriptures used to persecute him actually share the same realm with the likes of Mathew 5:14-16, which tells us to be the light, and Mathew 7:1-5, which tells us not to judge. Without the tainted lenses, controversy can be replaced with clarity.

Clearly, not everyone is suppose to be just like Tebow by doing goodwill acts of grandeur, such as missionary work oversees or building hospitals, but it doesn't hurt to strive for such things. The bigger picture about Tebow has to do with heart and character - something the world needs more of. True appreciation for him comes when we realized that the world can become a better place when people, especially children, have someone to look up to as a role model who inspires them to choose good over bad and to use their own God given talents and gifts for the greater good.

In the end, everyone has their own platform; there are those who have much smaller and simpler platforms and there are those with bigger platforms than Tebow's. The most important thing about Tebow is that he is helping people discover their platform and then encourages them to use it to help others by living an exemplary life.

Thanksgiving Day: Appreciating your Heritage

Happy Thanksgiving Day to all who live in America. This is truly a holiday worth celebrating because it is focused exclusively on the act of giving thanks for the things we are blessed with. This holiday exists because a group of people were courageous and brave enough to escape the religious persecution of their homeland to begin a new life of freedom here in America. Since then, countless of others have made the decision to leave their homelands and start a new life here. Whether it was done by boat, plane, automobile or feet; a price was paid by those who made it possible to experience all the freedoms this great country provides us. I hope we take the time in some shape or form to thank these people today.

I'm too tired at the moment to blog any further about this topic, so instead, I am providing the link to a related article I wrote for the Examiner. Please take the time to read more about our need to appreciate our heritage on this day of thanks.

Thanksgiving: Appreciate your Heritage

Courageous: An Ethnic Appreciation

There is a first time for everything.  When I went to the theatre twenty nine days ago to watch Courageous, I left there knowing I would return to watch it again or at the very least, rent the DVD; something not out of the ordinary.  Little did I know that I would actually return to watch it four times at the theatre!  I’ve never done that before.

Because of scheduling conflicts, I saw it by myself on the opening weekend and then blogged about it that evening.  The following weekend was with my wife.  The third was with my two daughters, and the fourth was with my son.   Each time was different; same movie, but different meanings, lessons and perspectives.

 

After processing it for the last four weeks, I’ve developed a deep sense of appreciation for my parent’s decision of leaving the Cordillera Mountains in the Philippines to raise our family here in America.  Like most people, my parents saw America as the land of opportunities.  They not only wanted to escape the oppressive Marcos dictatorship that posed as a real threat to my family at the time, but they wanted more than what a politically and economically crippled country had to offer my five sisters and me.

 

I grew up watching them work so hard to support our family.  My mother came to this country as a registered nurse and my father was a civil engineer.  After several years, they left their careers to pursue the American dream via the free enterprise system.  As they went from successful business to successful business, I began developing the false notion that America’s opportunities were limited to material and tangible things.  Money, houses, cars, degrees, titles, prestige, accolades and so forth were the most touted things at the time (still is).  Unfortunately, my youthful ignorance allowed these things to define the American dream for me.  I was too young to realize it then, but I now believe that the greatest opportunity our country has to offer is the freedoms afforded to parents to raise their children to the best of their abilities and for us as individuals to become the person we are suppose to become in God’s eyes.

 

As first generation immigrants, my parents took advantage of these freedoms by sacrificing to put five six children through Catholic schools and working the free enterprise system hard enough to keep us from the dangers that are often associated with low income and poverty.  Yet, as much as they tried their best, which I believe they did; I wish they spent more time with me and became more involved in my life on an intimate level.  I see this as a common problem with many new immigrants.

 

In my almost forty years in America, I’ve noticed that many new immigrants I was and am exposed to (particularly Asians and Hispanics) who decide to pursue the American dream by working very hard, often fall short of spending the amount of time needed to mold responsible and morally-driven children.  Those with lesser education and skills work hard just to survive, while those of higher education and skills work hard to provide a so-called better lifestyle for their families.  Either way, the children are often the victims of what my Marine Corps drill instructor called “good intention, wrong execution.”  In war, this often leads to the deaths of fellow Marines.  In life, this often leads to the death of character and moral values in our children.  The facts mentioned and portrayed in Courageous only supports what I’ve seen all too often: teenage pregnancies, teen drug addiction, irresponsibility, lawlessness, gangs, violence, suicides and so many other destructive patterns.  This is why Courageous “hit me between the eyes” (as Courageous’ Nathan Hayes was quoted when he was talking about the resolution).

The movie makes it clear that everything starts within the home.  Although it focuses on the role of men, it’s pretty clear that the entire family unit is the foundation for everything. So many people make the mistake of relying on schools and outside programs to mold their children.  This needs to change especially since our world has progressively become dangerous for kids.  The internet alone is enough to raise strong concerns about the exposure to pornography and destructive patterns to children as early as their first grade and second grade years.  As the main character in Courageous says in his speech,

“You can’t fall asleep at the wheel, only to wake up one day and realize that your job or your hobbies have no eternal value, but the souls of your children do.”

I know there is no such thing as a perfect family, and that is why I appreciate my experience in America even more.  Whenever the family falls short, there are others outside the family who can help forge our character for the better.  When you combine a loving family with good people such as mentors, coaches, teachers and leaders; synergy is formed and wonderful things happen as a result.

After watching courageous for the fourth time, I thought about the people in my own life that made a difference, and an immediate sense of gratitude came over me.  Without people like Frank Dachille (basketball coach), Bill Neu (mentor), Ikka Nakashima (mentor), Sgt Whitten (Marine Corps drill instructor), Hoichi Kurisu (mentor), Art Williams (business leader), Sister Imelda (1^st grade teacher), Sister Carol (high school teacher); I honestly think I would be worse off today.  Could people like these have entered my life had we stayed in the Philippine Cordilleras?  I don’t know, but if I were to speculate on this question, I think I would say “highly doubtful.”

I’ve always believed that if one sorts through all the bad garbage (and there is a lot) in America, one will find gems that make this country so great.  One of these gems is the making of inspirational movies like Courageous.  That’s right, even though Hollywood still inundates society with a plethora of degrading and harmful movies and shows; America still offers the opportunity for those who want to make a positive difference to create good and inspiring movies like Courageous, Soul Surfer, Blind Side, Fireproof, A Better Life and so forth.

When families and even mentors fall short, inspirational movies like Courageous helps fill in the gaps.  Thanks to Courageous, I have been blessed with the inspiration and opportunity to take my twelve and fifteen year old daughters to a restaurant where we made a pact similar to the father-daughter pact that Nathan had with his daughter in Courageous.  It wasn’t a fancy restaurant like in the movie, but it was more of their liking because of its Asian appeal – a Korean restaurant (one of their favorites).  Also, no rings were exchanged as was in the movie because one daughter thought it was a “cheesy” gesture.  Nonetheless, it was an unforgettable evening that would not have happened had I not seen the movie.  The movie also opened my children’s eyes to my desire to become the best father possible, which is truly priceless.   Lastly, it re-instills the importance of keeping an inspirational focus in my writing.

If you haven’t seen the movie yet, go see it or buy the DVD when it is available.  Until then, here is the sneak preview of the written resolution that the movie is centered on:

"I do solemnly resolve before God to take full responsibility for myself, my wife, and my children.  I WILL love them, protect them, serve them and teach them the Word of Goad as the spiritual leader of my home.  I WILL be faithful to my wife, to love and hoor her, and be willing to lay down my life for her as Jesus Christ did for me.  I WILL bless my children and teach them to love God with all of their hearts, all of their minds, and all of their strength.  I WILL train them to honor authority and live responsibly.  I WILL confront evil, pursue justice, and love mercy.  I WILL pray for others and treat them with kindness, respect, and compassion.  I WILL work diligently to provide for the needs of my family.  I WILL forgive those who have wronged me and reconcile with those I have wronged.  I WILL learn from my mistakes, repent of my sins, and walk with integrity as a man answerable to God.  I WILL seek to honor God, be faithful to His church, obey His  Word, and do His Will.  I WILL courageously work with the strength God provides to fulfill this resolution for the rest of my life and for His glory.  As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord."

Related blogs of interest: Courageous Fathers,  Soul Surfer Review,  Tim Tebow: An Ethnic Appreciation

Courageous Fathers

I was prepared to blog about the significant advantage of growing up in America with role models, coaches and mentors as compared to other countries that lack these people, that is, until I went to see today’s matinee showing of the movie” Courageous.” The movie was so inspirational that I’ve decided to shelve the topic of mentors and coaches for another day and talk to you about something much more important – Courageous fathers.

The Need for Fathers

Since my growing up years in America during the 70’s and 80’s; the image, role and personification of fathers have taken a drastic change for the worst. Our nation has been severely kicked in the kidney by the staggering number of fatherless children. As a result, we as a nation, bleed from within. The incapacitating blood makes its way out in various forms of pain, anger and sadness.

The movie points out several interesting statistics that supports the need for fathers. Just Google “father statistics” and you’ll find plenty of evidence. For example, Dadsworld.com sums up the importance of fathers by stating:

“Children with involved Fathers are more confident, better able to deal with frustration, better able to gain independence and their own identity, more likely to mature into compassionate adults, more likely to have a high self esteem, more sociable, more secure as infants, less likely to show signs of depression, less likely to commit suicide, more empathetic, boys have been shown to be less aggressive and adolescent girls are less likely to engage in sex.”

It goes on to list shocking statistics such as:

• 63% of teen suicides come from fatherless homes. That’s 5 times the national average. (Source: U.S. Dept of Health)
• 80% of rapists with anger problems come from fatherless homes. 14 times the national average. (Source: Justice and Behavior)
• 85% of children with behavioral problems come from fatherless homes. 20 times the national average. (Source: Center for Disease Control)
• Daughters of single parents without a Father involved are 53% more likely to marry as teenagers, 711% more likely to have children as teenagers, 164% more likely to have a pre-marital birth and 92% more likely to get divorced themselves. (SOURCE: Morse, Jennifer Roback. “Parents or Prisons.” Policy Review, 2003)

The last time I checked, the last virgin birth occurred 2011 years ago. That means every child since then has a biological father. So then, where are all of you?

Being a Father Is NOT Enough

The University of Texas at Austin once surveyed 701 fathers and discovered that the top 4 major obstacles for fathers to overcome are: 1) Work demands, 2) The media, 3) Pop Culture and 4) Finances. I couldn’t agree more, only I would add “ego” as a 5th, but since all four essentially feed our ego, I’ll leave it at the four.

I believe every father is hit by all of these at one time or another, but as the saying goes, “It’s not what happens to us, but how we react to those things that determine the outcome.” A father’s lack of involvement in their child’s life can no longer be blamed on these outside forces. We can no longer stand on the sidelines and passively watch the lives of our children go by.

Today is Saturday, and that means college football for many men. Tomorrow will be NFL day. Take a look at all those men who paint their faces and do crazy things to display their passion for the game. I love watching American football as much as any other man. In fact, I can easily be one of those guys with a painted blue face doing the Gator chomp at a Florida Gator game. If we men can be so passionate about something like football, why can’t we be as passionate about our families?

Courage

The movie forced me to look deeper at my role as a father, and quite frankly, I was uncomfortable at first, but quickly found myself reflecting on all the four aspects mentioned above. My weaknesses surfaced. I’ve always known my weaknesses deep down, but I haven’t had the courage to confront them with the level of intensity and faith that I know it takes. What can I say; I’m just as human as anyone else.

In my upcoming novel, Igorotdo: The Warrior Within, courage is one of the lessons that the main character learns from his Igorot ancestors. This same courage that enabled his people to resist more than three hundred years of colonization by Spain, overcome the superior Japanese enemy of WWII and overcome discrimination from Americans and fellow Filipinos is a key component of being a warrior both then and now.

Let’s make no mistake about it – it takes a warrior to become the kind of father we are created to become in God’s eyes. It takes a warrior of courage to give up pride-fueling desires for the sake of his family. It takes a warrior of courage to do things he is uncomfortable with for the sake of the family. It takes a warrior of courage to change any negative and destructive patterns that were passed down to him by unloving parents. It takes a warrior of courage to survive the plethora of kidney punches and kicks imposed on us by society.

I’ll leave you with the lyrics of Casting Crown’s song “Courageous” . . .

“We were made to be courageous. We were made to lead the way. We could be the generation that finally breaks the chains. . . We were warriors on the front lines standing unafraid, but now we’re watchers on the sidelines while our families slip away. Where are you, men of courage? You were made for so much more. . . We were made to be courageous and we’re taking back the fight. . . This is our resolution, our answer to the call. We will love our wives and children. We refuse to let them fall. We will reignite the passion that we buried deep inside. May the watchers become warriors. In the war of the mind I will make my stand. In the battle of the heart and the battle of the hand, we were made to be courageous . . . “

Switch heart Switch mind Switchfoot

Putting words on paper for a book, short story, memoir, novel and other forms or literature is a special task in itself. One profession that tends to be overlooked is that of song writers. Writing meaningful and inspiring songs always seems to impress me mainly because of how much can be told in such few amount of words. Many people think writing a novel is the most difficult thing to write, and it certainly can be, but I believe that writing songs that move ones soul towards a greater good can be as equally, if not more, difficult. Anyone can write fun, romantic and meaningless songs, but it takes a special songwriter to make a few words speak volumes in a way that engages someone deep within their core and has the power to provoke positive action and thought.

My first experience with such powerful songs was in my senior year of high school when I was introduced to the rock band, U2. For me, the lyrics from their albums “Unforgettable Fire” and “The Joshua Tree” connected with that inner part of me that longs for truth. Don’t get me wrong. The Edge’s unique guitar riffs and sounds, Adam’s almost navigational lead bass and Larry’s snares and rolls had a lot to do with my love for their music, but what captured me most were the words that came out of Bono’s mouth. Many people don’t realize that U2, one of the biggest rock bands ever, is also one of the leading voices of faith and social activism. If that statement intrigues you, get a copy of the book “Walk On: The Spiritual Journey of U2.”

The impact that music has had on me is one of the main driving forces in my desire to write. I find it incredible how musical lyrics can inspire someone to take positive action in their own lives. This is why we need more people writing inspirational music, books and novels. For all those writers out there already doing so, “kudos,” I say to you.

Going back to that time in my life; it was then that I realized the importance of feeding my mind with more music that provokes, inspires and challenges me to become a better person. I had a change of heart or “switch heart” so to speak. As a teenager, I began realizing how all the vice-inspiring music I once listened to mostly promote a kind of life that isn’t intended for me. I went from a change of heart to a change of mind or “switch mind” when I became more conscious of the lyrics and meanings of every song I heard. Did I completely stop listening to mainstream pop, rock and other genre music? Of course not, but when given the chance and choice, I usually gravitated toward music of inspiration and encouragement. I listen more to the lyrics than the musical notes and composition. My favorite U2 song, “40,” which happens to come from Psalms 40, eloquently captures my change in musical outlook at the time.

From "40":

I waited patiently for the Lord

He inclined and heard my cry

He lifted me up out of the pit

Out of the miry clay

I will sing, sing a new song

I will sing, sing a new song . . . "

Music is food. There is healthy music and there is junk music. Junk music is the songs that promote the vices that are behind all the unhappiness in our lives. Like junk food, this music is okay at moderate levels, but too much can lead to heap of soulful unhappiness.

U2 isn’t the only band I listen to, but they’re still one of the few “secular” sounding bands that can evoke meaning that is worthy of the good book itself. I try to keep up with current music so as not to cling on to the past. In fact, today I was listening to my favorite Christian radio station for an hour while driving home. They had the rock band, Switchfoot, as their live guests in the studio. In between interviews, they played songs from their upcoming album, Vice Versus.

As usual, I paid particular attention to the lyrics. Like U2, their songs contained lyrics that evoked a deeper meaning that could have anyone walking away a better person. Also like U2, the poetry and word play were so cleverly done that one could draw in the meaning and message rather than having it spoon fed to them. I liked all the songs, but the top three that I like most are “Where I belong”, “Thrive” and “Vice Versus. Just read a sampling of the lyrics and you’ll know why:

From "Thrive":

"I've been awake for an hour or so

Checking for a pulse but I just don't know

Am I a man if I feel like a ghost?

The stranger in the mirror is wearing my clothes

No, I'm not alright

I know that I'n not right

A steering wheel doesn't mean you can drive

A warm body doesn't mean I'm alive. . . "

From "Vice Versus":

"Let the pacific laugh

Be on my epitah

With it's rising and falling

And after all, it's just water

And I am just a soul

With a body of water and bones

Water and bones. . . "

From "Where I Belong":

"We were born into the fight

But I'm not sentimental

This skin and bones is a rental

And no one makes it out alive

Until I die singing these songs

On the shores of Babylon. . .

Still looking for a home

In a world that I belong

Where we can find the strong

Where the righteous can right the wrong. . . "

Switchfoot - Vice Versus


Switchfoot- Where I Belong


Switchfoot - Thrive


U2 - 40

9/11: Moving On But Never Over

Scornful Treatment of “Our Pearl Harbor”

The tenth anniversary of the devastating events of 9/11 (our Pearl Harbor) is fast upon us.  Hopefully, many people will remember, memorialize and pray for all those who lost their lives that horrible day.  Notice, I said "hopefully." 

Last July, I came across a headline about a lawsuit filed by an organization called “The American Atheists.”  The organization was demanding the removal of the cross enshrined at the 9/11 memorial and museum in New York City.  Fortunately, Congressman J. Randy Forbes slammed the lawsuit and defended the cross while calling the organization’s efforts “sad and misguided.” 

Earlier this week I learned of the terrible decision by the Mayor of New York City, Michael Bloomberg, to exclude any prayers from clergy at ground zero in this Sunday’s official memorial ceremony.  In addition, Mayor Bloomberg is NOT allowing the first responders (firefighters, police, paramedics, etc.) of that tragic day attend the ceremony.  What a shame!  What can be more scornful than that?

How about taking salt and rubbing it into the gaping wounds just mentioned, which many seem to be doing.  The salt I am talking about is actually the notion that we, the nation, needs to “get over” 9/11 and move on.  Hard to believe, but I’ve heard this mentioned on several occasions in the last few days.  The first thought that came across my mind was whether these people ever lost a loved one.  If so, they should know better than to think we should get over it.

Getting Over?

Let me shift gears here and attempt to address a topic that I think women are better at articulating: the death of loved ones.  Most men, including me, tend to allow our machismo to hide what I believe is a basic fundamental truth about how we get over the death of a loved one, and that is – we DON’T.  Oh sure, anyone can play the game and “appear” so, but the reality within the crevasses of our heart says otherwise.

Sixteen years has passed since the car that my parents and baby sister were in flipped into the air over the highway median and landed on a fast approaching car.  I lost all of them that day and the surviving five year old boy in the other car lost his parents as well.  Mourning is expected immediately after the incident and even months thereafter, but for some reason, people develop a notion that one “gets over” it.  To the common eye, I certainly appear so because I am able to talk about them without signs of pain (usually).  Some of the large pictures of them that used to take up wall space at my last residence remain stored in the basement of the new house.  By appearance, I guess it's easy for one to come to the conclusion that I'm over it.

The truth is, I never got over it, and I will never get over it.  I love my dad.  I love my mom.  I love my sister.  I still periodically dream about them as if they were still alive, and when I wake up, I try going back to sleep so that I can be "there" with them longer.  Every time I meet new parents in their early thirties, I think about my sister and the kids and husband she would have had she survived the crash.  In some shape or form, I think about them every day. Their deaths have created three vacant holes in my heart/soul that only they can ever fill.  Fortunately, their love gives me the faith to believe that someday those holes will be filled if I make the right decisions in life and join them in their heavenly splendor, but until then, the holes remain within.

Moving On

Last month, my friend, Marlon, invited my family to his house to join them in a memorial dinner in memory of his father and grandfather.  I was pleasantly surprised to get the invitation because it was something more of his planning than that of his wonderful wife.  Like most men, Igorot men are no different when it comes to keeping our macho wits about us.  When we arrived, several others of our Igorot friends were already there.  I walked into the dining room and smiled at all the delicious food set on the table.  Immediately next to the table were two large pictures of his father and grandfather that stared at everyone in  the room.  It was an appropriate setting.

We all gathered around the table and listened to his heartfelt memorial prayer.  Upon the conclusion of his prayer, we “moved on” and began eating in a more festive spirit.  Later that evening, several of us were gathered in the dining room talking and drinking.  It so happened that we all lost a loved one somewhat recently. 

I poured a glass of brandy for everyone and we all did a toast to those we lost.  Afterwards, we took turns sharing our funniest memory of them.  It was great to cut through all the small-talk smoke and mirrors and just talk about someone we cared so much about, even though it was humorous.  It’s these moments of memorializing that helps us move on with our lives.  More importantly, they help remind us of our tasks as parents and the need to leave behind that which is most important – Love.

Our Pearl Harbor

On December 7, 1941, Pearl Harbor was attacked by the Japanese Imperial Navy.    Hundreds were injured and nearly three thousand Americans were killed.  Those who survived the attack and are still living today will tell you that they never got over it.  Imagine how they would feel if prayer were not allowed at the memorial services then or if the military service men and women survivors were not allowed to attend their tenth anniversary in 1951.  Has main stream society’s political correctness gone too far?  Yes it has.

However, you can make a difference by not allowing this weekend to go by without taking a moment to pray in your own way for those who lost their lives, their surviving loved one and the future of our country.  Like Marlon's dinner; the combination of prayer, fellowship and memorials are what will keep this country from deteriorating.